We were dating in grad school but we were still not spending every lunch together. I went off with my group that I had and he went with someone else or knowing Carl he ate alone. He did eat with another grad assistant in our department. Carl said that we were invited to his plays. I was aghast because the guy totally creeped me out and I didn't even like his proximity to my carrel. Nevertheless off we went to see" Emperor Jones" and "No Exit" and "Waiting for Godot" (believe me I felt like I was in the Sartre play). The acting was not the best and I was relieved we were not expected to join him after the play.
A few days later Carl comes and says I think I am done having lunch with him. I ask why because even though this is fairly early in our relationship I already had the feeling he could eat lunch with Stalin or maybe Hitler and say, "It's only an hour out of my life. What does it matter?" With this idea I was shocked he had decided to abort the lunch time with this colleague of ours. He only went once or twice and he said they he sort of creeped him out by saying, "My wife and I only stay together because we hate each other less than the rest of the world." I said that does it for me having had some bad experiences when befriending people who I should not have. He did, however, get us interested in Par Lagervist.
A few months later we turn on the news and they are pulling a dead woman out of the Ohio River and she is strangled. She is a local teacher and she had been strangled. Her name happened to be the same as the colleague in question. We looked at each other and said at once, "They are going to arrest him. It has to be him."
We get to the university which is a buzz about the murder and everyone, I mean, everyone thinks he did it. People in our department; people who knew her , everyone. Before about 24 hours were up he was arrested. There was a history of domestic abuse and neighbors had called the police in the past. She never did anything. That night they heard her scream and didn't call. He killed her, folded her clothes by the river and threw her in the river. He got thirty years. I suggested not having the eat with anyone policy any longer.